
When I started writing my blog, it was going to be a story solely about blindness, but as the years have progressed, I have discovered that the story of my blindness is the part that weaves itself into the whole, but isn’t the only thread that gives meaning. With this realization my blog has become about a life with blindness, rather than a life of blindness. Blindness makes my life more challenging, but it isn’t all of me; it often decides my fate, but it doesn’t define me. It leads me to places I never imagined and to the rediscovery of places I had thought forever lost. Blindness has brought friendships and community into my life in such fulfilling and sustaining ways, and it has allowed me to work through things I believed insurmountable. But there is one battle I just can’t seem to win, the battle of Zelda.
If you are acquainted with my blog, then you may remember Zelda, the thorn in my eye who I tried to see as a savior, but let’s just say it was a struggle to get clarity, and continues to be a struggle. For those of you who don’t know or remember her, Zelda is my white cane. I wrote a whole series of posts about my early days with Zelda during my O&M lessons, if you are interested in reading a bit about her background.
So, forward almost three years, and the truth is that Zelda has rarely seen the light of day. It’s sad really, given that she was supposed to bring some light into my hands and help guide my way over the precarious streets in this city of questionable angels, but I just can’t make peace with her, no matter how many times I trip or fall, no matter how clear it is that I need her.
I stashed her at the bottom of a bag, which I put in another bag, which I put at the back of a high shelf in my closet, in an attempt to forget about her, but the bruises seem to fade much more slowly as I get older, sitting on my skin as a reminder that I am not safe. My husband will periodically mention Zelda, ask where she is and if I might try her out again. I know he worries about me. I tell him I don’t want to be the blind wife. I don’t want him to feel ashamed or embarrassed. I tell him I wish I could be less broken, feel more like a partner and less like a burden.
I do recognize that I need Zelda, so I started to think about what it is that bothers me about her. The reasons are many and complicated, but one tangible thing is that I find her to be way too tall. So, I decided to try out some shorter canes. I am just over five feet tall, and although my O&M teacher was a fan of a taller cane, I never felt comfortable with Zelda’s height. So, enter into the picture, Persephone of medium height, and Maud who is short and round, just like me. I don’t know if the shorter canes will help me feel more comfortable, but I do know that I have to try something. The thing is, the virus took over just when they arrived, and now we are all at home together for the foreseeable future. When the stay at home order is lifted, I just might go outside and give them a whirl.
April 17, 2020 at 11:13 am
I’ve always loved the name Maud. 🙂 You are the bravest person I know.
April 17, 2020 at 11:52 am
Me too! I Love the old lady names! Thank you Sweet Sarah! I love you!
April 17, 2020 at 11:19 am
I’m intrigued by the names and how well they fit their personalities. Especially Maud. I hope she will tread softly without treading on your dreams.
April 17, 2020 at 11:52 am
Oh, I adore this!!! Thank you Christopher!!!
April 17, 2020 at 4:39 pm
I have no idea what you are feeling about your situation, but I do understand the complicated feelings of chronic illness and feeling like a burden. But those accessories don’t define you….they are there to help you live your life to the absolute fullest……we all have them, some are just more visible than others. Sending you love and light…….
April 17, 2020 at 4:54 pm
Thank you so much, Wendi!!!
April 17, 2020 at 8:36 pm
bless you!
April 17, 2020 at 9:30 pm
I love Maud. Is it a he or she?
Do let us know.
April 18, 2020 at 7:33 am
I love the names, especially Maud! You are brave. 💜
April 18, 2020 at 10:07 am
Thank you so much, Angela! I think Maud may end up being the one I hang out with the most!
April 18, 2020 at 10:12 am
I hope this doesn’t come off as insensitive, as that is NOT my intention, just a bit of humor. But I thought of Maud as a person with whom you’d been reluctantly paired, sort of like The Odd Couple. Do you remember that show??
April 18, 2020 at 10:18 am
You have to have humor about this stuff!! I Love it! Maud totally sounds like part of an odd couple pair! And there is most definitely reluctance on my part! Hahaha!!!! I adore you, Angela!!! xoxoxo
April 19, 2020 at 7:37 pm
Haha! I’m glad it made you smile! Have a great week, Susan. 💜
April 20, 2020 at 3:30 am
You too! Sending love to you and your beautiful family!
April 18, 2020 at 1:24 pm
Think of them as friends who help you travel your path—you’ve given them the names of lovely women:-)
April 18, 2020 at 4:56 pm
Thank you, Lovely Lady!!!
April 19, 2020 at 8:48 am
Oh, Susan, use the tools that guide you through this crazy life! You don’t leave the house without shoes, do ya? Glasses? Hope? Perseverance?! Leave “stubborn” at home with “terror” and go forth with “exhilaration” and “Maud.”
But, like, not today. Today, stay home. 😉
April 19, 2020 at 11:28 am
Thank you, Tom!!!! This made me smile and feel happy! You are the best!
April 20, 2020 at 8:59 am
You can do this Susan!
April 20, 2020 at 9:25 am
Thank you so much, Mark! I hope you are safe and well!
April 22, 2020 at 12:35 pm
Here is the one thing I learned about the proper sizing of a cane is that has served me well: Place your arms at your sides in a standing position. The top of Zelda’s the “handle” should not be any higher than the line at the bottom of the wrist of the hand that will hold her. Measure the distance from the floor to that spot, and that is how long your cane should be
April 22, 2020 at 1:31 pm
This is very helpful! Thank you, Steve!!!
April 23, 2020 at 5:25 pm
I think canes are very stylish! I always have. Zelda, Persephone, and Maud are quite distinguished names. I do so hope you get sunglasses to match each one! I do believe you will ‘wear’ the cane, it won’t wear you!😊💜
April 24, 2020 at 8:40 am
Thank you, Beautiful! I Love the idea of sunglasses for each cane!!!!
April 24, 2020 at 9:18 am
I believe it’s a must Susan! When should we go shopping?😊
April 24, 2020 at 10:59 am
xoxoxoxoxo