I have been thinking a lot about time. The passing of it, the motion, the gift and the cruelty of it. I am thankful for the memories it gives me, the love and friendship. I hate it for everything it takes away. Time shows itself with constant vigor. It appears in the music I love, the way I dance and my favorite things to eat. It appears in the lines around my eyes, in the scars that linger and mark the pitfalls of my past. It shows itself in the explosion of color that traverses across my body.
My body is covered in a garden of time. Images that mark the decades without my mom, and the year my brother died. Flowers cover my arms and legs, reminding me of friendships, love and loss. In the early years of getting tattooed, I assigned meaning to each new piece of artwork, but as the years passed, the artwork came to symbolize the passing of time. I know which tattoos I got when I was going through breakups and breakdowns. During the worst and most lengthy of my depressions, I only left the house for three reasons: therapy, buying wine and frozen meals at the 711 (half a block from my apartment), and getting tattooed. I felt at home in the tattoo shop then, accepted and comfortable. The colorful pictures that were punctured into my skin, brought beauty into a time that was painfully bleak.
My writing is often full of darkness, but the artwork on my body is all light and color. I have always known that part of my motivation in getting so heavily tattooed, was to turn something ugly into something beautiful. I have no angry, frightening or foreboding tattoos. Even the ones that mark death anniversaries are full of color. I didn’t want fear on my body; there is enough of it in my heart. I didn’t want hatred on my skin; hatred of my body is one of the things I have tried to conceal beneath the moons, stars, butterflies and roses. I wanted to see something beautiful when I looked in the mirror, something vibrant and alive.
My favorite tattoo is one of the smaller ones, but it marks the happiest time of my life. It is something I vowed I would never do, but that was before I met my husband and felt what it was like to be home. I knew he and I would be together for lifetimes, that our love was unbreakable.
July 22, 2018 at 8:57 am
This caught me by surprise, it’s so nice! I love you very much.
July 22, 2018 at 9:16 am
I Love you!!!!
July 22, 2018 at 9:07 am
Talk about the Ying and the Yang! Dark on the inside, bright on the outside. Personally, I think what you’ve described is the perfect metaphor for what many people battle on a daily basis. Your writing is a vehicle to let the poison out before so your exterior can shine bright
July 22, 2018 at 9:17 am
This is beautiful, Steve. Thank you.
July 22, 2018 at 9:12 am
time sand
flow
even
to the ocean
a river
of now and then
get and lose
think about dawn!
July 22, 2018 at 11:54 am
Fabulous ❤️
July 22, 2018 at 5:34 pm
Thank you, Beautiful!!!!
July 22, 2018 at 1:01 pm
Oh this is absolutely beautiful. I loved reading it.
July 22, 2018 at 5:34 pm
Thank you so much!!!!!
July 22, 2018 at 1:18 pm
I love this…you are sharing something quite intimate that shows us the so much more of who you really are. And, just like your writing, you are beautiful, and dark, and light, and complex.
July 22, 2018 at 5:35 pm
Thank you, Sweet Wulf!!!!
July 22, 2018 at 3:34 pm
You are so magnificent, Susan. I loved reading this about you, all of it. This tatoo is gorgeous, just gorgeous. You and Joe—it gives me such hope. What an incredible person you are. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
July 22, 2018 at 5:36 pm
I love you, BB!!!!!
July 22, 2018 at 10:37 pm
This is such beautiful, heartfelt writing. You have shared so much of you, the Susan we have all grown to know and love. Joe is so blessed to have you Susan, and you are blessed to have him. It’s a lovely tattoo.
July 23, 2018 at 8:20 am
Thank you, Walt! I am so incredibly lucky and even in all then darkness, I may feel, I never cease to be grateful for Joe. I vowed the only names I would ever have tattooed were Mom and Dad, but Joe changed that.
July 23, 2018 at 1:09 pm
You’re very welcome ☺
July 23, 2018 at 5:38 am
That is a stunning design. So simple, yet so complex and meaningful. What a beautiful and personal expression of your love and connection to each other.
July 23, 2018 at 8:26 am
Thank you! I am very lucky. I wish I could take credit for the design of the tattoo, but that is all my friend Emily, who designed over 90% of my tattoos with just vague suggestions from me. For this one, I told her I wanted a Celtic heart and what it was for and she came up with this. I didn’t tell Joe I was doing it, so he was very surprised.
July 23, 2018 at 6:50 am
I adore the inspirational love you share with Joe! And your description of time, your own heart, and that low point you described so ominously and easily (“buying wine and frozen meals at the 711”) were sublime. Truly a gifted writer and storyteller; truly a favorite of mine online. Thank you for the share, and what a beautiful tattoo!
July 23, 2018 at 8:28 am
Oh, Tom!!!! You are so lovely! Thank you so much for all of your support and kindness. And, that favorite thing…..the feeling is very mutual!!!!!
July 23, 2018 at 11:45 am
Steve beat me… my thought too, the dark on the inside the colorful on the out. Speaks volumes. ❤
July 23, 2018 at 2:18 pm
Thank you, Kim!!!!
July 23, 2018 at 11:52 pm
This caught me by surprise….but then again, not really since it’s you. Light and darkness. Desperation and hope. Complexity. Uniqueness.
Loved this. Thanks for sharing and opening up.
July 24, 2018 at 8:22 am
Thank you, Gorgeous Lady!
July 24, 2018 at 1:04 pm
This is so beautiful and full of heart. You’ve exposed what I love about human beings – the depth of our hurts and the lightness of our dreams and love, all swirling together and unrolling and changing perspective with time. I too wear time on my skin and in my head and heart. You shared that in a way that speaks to the universal experience of our souls. Just sublime.
July 24, 2018 at 2:45 pm
This is an immensely beautiful compliment! Thank you so much!
July 25, 2018 at 2:20 am
Yes, time is wonderful and time is terrible.
August 14, 2018 at 7:09 pm
I so understand about time. I also feel for your loss of vision. I, too, am fighting for my sight, with a little (but not much more) hope. I am undergoing treatments for macular degeneration. But as to time, forgive me, but will you allow me to post this rendering of mine about time.
TIME
© Barbara Grace Lake 2018
Uncaring, ruthless time, hold back
Conceding there is no return
I do not wish some ghostly hand
Return to life a former time
When I was less than twenty five
And time itself seemed infinite
When days, not blaming stripling age,
Were filled with fleeting, youthful craze
Of parties, dance, erotic lust
Euterpe’s waste in primal quest
How recklessly I dared each day
I’d not repeat that time again
Though when, perhaps, my first born child
Drank deeply from his mother’s breast
Or when a baby daughter cooed
Or children’s laughter filled the house
These things I’d love to see, but no,
Vignettes like this are better dreams
I could not know when I was young
How precious time would be in age
How quickly fly unyielding years
My neighbor’s children, grown like mine
And now I struggle savoring
Each hour a gift to see and feel.
August 14, 2018 at 8:28 pm
This is so beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing.
August 16, 2018 at 8:47 am
Very well spoken, good read.
August 16, 2018 at 8:48 am
Thank you, so much!
November 8, 2018 at 11:34 am
I love this, and again, it hits home. I just got another one last week. Except this one is different. Instead of marking a moment in time or paying homage to something? it marks a fork in a road for me I believe.
November 9, 2018 at 7:34 am
Angela, I would love to know more about your artwork!!
November 9, 2018 at 8:56 am
Likewise! Mine began with a tattoo for my 21st birthday (26 years ago) from a shop down the street from my college. It was impulsive; I had no idea what I wanted and left with a tattoo. I went back to have something added to it a few months later and went to a different shop a few years later to have more added. The second was also on impulse on the way home from spring break in key west. We pulled off at a shop off the highway and I spent my last $40 on a tattoo. I had no money to eat for the rest of the trip! The ones on my arms were planned ahead much like you described. I found an awesome guy who drew some things from ideas based on memories and time spent with people I love. The one I just got is something drawn by an amazing artist I’ve been admiring for a while. She did a stream of consciousness piece for my husband last year and it’s unbelievable. She’d been drawing these Hungarian folk art inspired pieces and one in particular spoke to me, one with earth toned greens, blues, yellows and grays. She photographed my chest and reworked/redrew the piece specifically to fit my chest space. We spent an entire day taking and she tattooed the whole thing. The reason I said I felt this piece was a marking of a crossroads is because historically, I punish myself internally for things I feel are shortcomings. I’ve a long while, but especially the last year, evaluating the process by which I go about doing that. Body image and my internal dialogue about myself in particular. I have such a hard time with that. I’d never have been partially undressed in front of anyone other than my husband knowing I fell short of goals, didn’t live up to my own expectations, etc. I certainly would t have ‘rewarded’ myself with a tattoo or marked the time with anything lasting, something I’d have to see in the mirror on this body, forever. But I did go, I did get the tattoo, I spoke openly and vulnerably to the wonderful person tattooing me. It’s something.
November 9, 2018 at 9:22 am
Angela, this is huge and something I strive for. I know how powerful the experience must have been. And the art sounds breathtaking. I haven’t had any work done in years, partly because my friend and artist moved to a shop much further away, and also because of body image stuff. It is such a complicated thing. Thank you for sharing this with me, for being so open about all of it. I feel such a connection with you and the experiences you write about. You are truly inspiring to me!!!!!
November 9, 2018 at 12:49 pm
It was powerful. I love it, thank you! And these issues are very complicated! It will likely be an ongoing challenge for me. What a bummer she moved away, she sounds amazing. The one you shared is beautiful! If we the same, Susan. Thank you for sharing with me! You inspire me as well. I appreciate that more than I can say.
November 9, 2018 at 9:00 am
I would also add that here is a huge gap in years between those first tattoos and the rest. I was busy building a life that looked perfect on the outside for a long while and not always expressing myself in ways that made me feel good, or in ways that made me have to dig too deeply, if that makes sense. I’m over that. Lol
November 9, 2018 at 9:27 am
I Love this!!! My story is similar. I got my first at 21, then a very spontaneous one in New Hampshire on a road trip with friends when I was 22. I got a few more small things during the following few years, and then in my late 30’s, I started getting a lot of work done. I hid it from my family for years, but no more. You definitely have me thinking of going to see my friend and getting something new!!!!
November 9, 2018 at 12:53 pm
That’s so awesome! I’m so glad you aren’t hiding it anymore. I say go for it!! To hell with what that voice says about your body or what it says about how others view you! I think it feels so much like making peace and coming home. I’ll be getting more for sure. Lol
November 9, 2018 at 4:09 pm
You definitely have me thinking!!!! Thank you Angela!!!