Love, perspective, and the deepest emotions have been gifted to me so many times through poetry. Poems are endlessly teaching me about other people, about myself and the world. I write poetry to gain an understanding of the facets of humanity and to immerse myself in the magic of language. I read it for the same reason.
When I was in my early 20’s, my Dad gave me a copy of this poem by William Carlos Williams. It was a copy he printed from the internet, and I still have that copy, tacked up on my writing board above my desk. I don’t think it was an accident that my Dad gave me this poem. I think he was trying to tell me something about himself and about his life at the time. As I got older and got to know myself and my Dad better, the meaning of this poem became clearer.
For me, this poem is about a moment of quiet but powerful triumph, immersed in a profound loneliness, a loneliness that has been accepted, even embraced. It is a picture of who this man allows himself to be when no one is watching, who he believes himself to be. It is vulnerability in the light of the sun.
If when my wife is sleeping
and the baby and Kathleen
are sleeping
and the sun is a flame-white disc
in silken mists
above shining trees,-
if I in my north room
dance naked, grotesquely
before my mirror
waving my shirt round my head
and singing softly to myself:
“I am lonely, lonely,
I was born to be lonely,
I am best so!”
If I admire my arms, my face,
my shoulders, flanks, buttocks
against the yellow drawn shades,-
Who shall say I am not
the happy genius of my household?
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April 22, 2018 at 6:59 am
Such an amazing tribute to your dad and to that young girl who had the wisdom and heart to ascribe such an interpretation. Beautiful way to start my Sunday morning.
April 22, 2018 at 7:26 am
Thank you Beautiful!!!! You just brightened mine. By the way, my Dad’s favorite part of “Letches” wasn’t the poem itself, but your beautiful comment. He said he could tell you were an extraordinary writer, just from those few words. I told him he was absolutely right. I hope you are doing something wonderful today!
April 22, 2018 at 8:01 am
Wow, that just choked me up a lil. Well, I can’t say I agree…the poem is extraordinary, but I do kinda love your dad. ☺️
April 22, 2018 at 8:20 am
He is a great man, and the smartest man I have ever known. He knows what he’s talking about. And he’s honest. You have such a gift!!!!!
April 22, 2018 at 8:21 am
That truly did make my day so much brighter. Give your dad a big hug for me…and tell him to squeeze you back for me! 🙂
April 22, 2018 at 8:23 am
I will!!! I am on my way to see him soon! Have a wonderful day!!!!! xoxoxoxoxo
April 22, 2018 at 8:37 am
Wonderful, Susan.
Yes yes…have a most amazing day with your dad!!!
April 22, 2018 at 9:18 am
Ohhhhh! I absolutely love this poem and it’s place in your story. Thank you for sharing ❤️
April 22, 2018 at 10:10 am
I thought you might like this, Rita!!!!
April 22, 2018 at 10:22 am
Oh so very much!
April 22, 2018 at 12:52 pm
I read him, but not this gem, I’m afraid. Absolutely amazing.
I’m a great fan of free verse. Though there’s no rhyme, its rhythm is very melodious and it runs very smoothly.
Dancing naked implies a sense of freedom and grotesquely that he’s not the most attractive man on the planet. But, the rhetorical question in the end is pretty encouraging. Since there’s nobody around, he’s the only judge of his looks and as such can only approve of the only person whose opinion he cares about, himself.
Brilliant.
April 22, 2018 at 1:21 pm
It’s lovely that your dad did that for you. I’ve always loved Williams ever since I was in high school and read The Red Wheelbarrow. It wasn’t so much the striking images, but the two lines: “So much depends/upon”. I’ve wracked my brains for years trying to understand what the ‘so much’ was. Also, the lines are structured like wheelbarrows, which is also cool.
April 23, 2018 at 8:17 am
This poem was actually my introduction to him and I didn’t delve much further, but I have one of his collections and I am going to start reading more. I have been reading so much by new poets; I think it is time for me to step back in time a bit.
April 23, 2018 at 3:05 pm
T.S. Eliot is one of the best older poets in my opinion–try my two favourites: “Marina” and “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock” if you haven’t already read them.
April 23, 2018 at 3:31 pm
I love him as well!!!! I have a brilliant poet friend who once told me T.S. Eliot saved her life! I was sold on him the minute she said that (a long time ago). I am always looking for recommendations, so please don’t hesitate to give them!!!
April 24, 2018 at 6:29 am
Eliot is the reason I became an English teacher. I remember sitting in my high school classroom and reading Prufrock for the first time. I thought, “I want a job where I can share my love of this”, and I did for a great many years:-)
April 24, 2018 at 7:52 am
I Love this!!!!!!! Thank you for sharing this!!!
April 22, 2018 at 7:59 pm
Your amazing Dad has an amazing daughter. ☺❤
April 23, 2018 at 8:18 am
Walt, this is the most beautiful thing you could say! You have made my day! Thank you!
April 23, 2018 at 4:21 pm
My pleasure! Glad you liked it 💛
April 24, 2018 at 7:11 am
Wow, never heard of this poet, and my oh my, this one left me a bit speechless as I try to fully understand the meaning of the poem. Thank you for sharing! 😉
April 24, 2018 at 8:00 am
I am so glad you like it Carrie Ann! It is a very special poem, and was my introduction to William Carlos Williams as well.
June 29, 2018 at 1:28 am
… and it’s the sheer accepting-honesty of oneself, here, enjoying those bits flubbing about which one usually avoids or rationalises is not there