So, it seems my Tiny Terrors post was a bit unfinished; sometimes I forget that just because I know the conclusion of something, doesn’t mean other people do.  Where did it end…….ok, on the bed in the dark, panic attack, no more Top Chef………

I stayed in the dark for what felt like hours; eyes shut tight and mind racing.  I was so afraid to open my eyes to that demolishing light; so afraid that this time the change would be permanent.  I imagined having to adopt my sunglasses as a full-time appendage rather than just a means of fashionable protection from the sun.  I wondered if I could get used to watching the television or reading with half the images distorted and burned white.  I wasn’t ready to face such a blatant change to my vision; the distortion was somehow so much more terrifying than the darkness.  In darkness I can hide, but in the bright distortion I felt impaled and vulnerable.  Trapped.

I knew I would have to open my eyes sometime; face whatever reality waited for me.  My husband was texting me from work.  I had to answer him.  I rolled over and grasped for my phone on the side table.  I opened my eyes.  My gorgeous blurry room had returned to normal.  The tears poured down my cheeks.